In the Grand Tradition of Socrates V. Dopey... [Jonah Goldberg]
and Godzilla V. Bambi, Mike Tyson V. Pee Wee Herman, and
Patton V. Barbra Streisand I bring you Popular Mechanics V. Rosie O'Donnell.
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Friday, March 30, 2007
Carjacker Beaten By 6-Year-Old Girl, Going to Jail
This guy's time in prison ain't gonna be fun for him, but oh, just thinking about it makes me laugh. Coincidentally, he looks a lot like a dumbass I used to work with.
The family's car was wrecked, but Ellen Degeneres gave them a new one when they appeared on her show.
The carjacker who was fought off by a schoolbook-wielding 6-year-old girl earlier this month in Allapattah has been arrested, Miami police said Friday.
Erick Fuentes, 34, has been charged with carjacking, kidnapping, aggravated battery and battery.
With her fists and the schoolbook Sarah's Unicorn, Briana beat on the carjacker until he stopped the car and ordered the children out.
John Travolta Thinks We Should Move To Another Planet (But Until Then You Should Cut Back On Your Energy Usage)
Barbarino proves not all Hollywood types are idiots.
(And I'll bet 20 bucks this shows up on South Park in some manner.)
John Travolta, Scientology & The Global Warming Solution
By StaffMar 30, 2007
John Travolta [who owns five jets. FIVE jets] has revealed his bizarre solution for global warming - move to another planet. The actor, who is a follower of Scientology, thinks the only way mankind may be able to survive the impending environmental disaster is to colonise another world.
Travolta - who infuriated environmentalists by flying his private jet to the London premiere of his new film 'Wild Hogs' - told BANG Showbiz: "I think that everyone can do their bit, but I'm wondering if we have to start thinking about other planets and also domed cities, because I don't know if there's a way to repair these holes in the sky."
Despite his concerns, the 53-year-old actor - who owns and flies his own Boeing 707 - doesn't plan to cut down on his own carbon emissions by flying less.
He said: "The thing is, I use them as a business tool. Maybe aviation will move into not contributing to those factors, but for the next 50 years, at least, that will be a fact."
The founder of Scientology, American science fiction writer L Ron Hubbard, claimed that extra terrestrial beings were sent to Earth by intergalactic ruler Xenu, who then blew up the aliens with hydrogen bombs in a volcano.
(And I'll bet 20 bucks this shows up on South Park in some manner.)
John Travolta, Scientology & The Global Warming Solution
By StaffMar 30, 2007
John Travolta [who owns five jets. FIVE jets] has revealed his bizarre solution for global warming - move to another planet. The actor, who is a follower of Scientology, thinks the only way mankind may be able to survive the impending environmental disaster is to colonise another world.
Travolta - who infuriated environmentalists by flying his private jet to the London premiere of his new film 'Wild Hogs' - told BANG Showbiz: "I think that everyone can do their bit, but I'm wondering if we have to start thinking about other planets and also domed cities, because I don't know if there's a way to repair these holes in the sky."
Despite his concerns, the 53-year-old actor - who owns and flies his own Boeing 707 - doesn't plan to cut down on his own carbon emissions by flying less.
He said: "The thing is, I use them as a business tool. Maybe aviation will move into not contributing to those factors, but for the next 50 years, at least, that will be a fact."
The founder of Scientology, American science fiction writer L Ron Hubbard, claimed that extra terrestrial beings were sent to Earth by intergalactic ruler Xenu, who then blew up the aliens with hydrogen bombs in a volcano.
If There's Going To Be A 50-Foot Robot of Any Musical Figure Roaming Around In the Dessert, It Had Damn Well Better Be Iron Maiden's Eddie
Maybe we could have both of them and let them fight it out in the desert like in Transformers or the classic 1990 movie Robot Jox and its 1993 sequel Robot Wars (which I still haven't seen yet, curses!!!).
Michael Jackson wants Vegas robot
Michael Jackson is in discussions about creating a 50-foot robotic replica of himself to roam the Las Vegas desert, according to reports.
The pop legend is currently understood to be living in the city, as he considers making a comeback after 2004's turbulent child sex case.
It has now been claimed that his plans include an elaborate show in Vegas, which would feature the giant Jacko striding around the desert, firing laser beams.
If built, the metal monster would apparently be visible to aircraft as they come in to land in the casino capital.
It is the centerpiece of an elaborate Jackson-inspired show in Vegas, according to Andre Van Pier, the robot's designer.
Luckman Van Pier, his partner at the company behind the proposal, claims blueprints have been drawn up for the show and seen by the star.
"Michael's looked at the sketches and likes them," he told the New York Daily News.
On the subject of the robot, he continued: "It would be in the desert sands. Laser beams would shoot out of it so it would be the first thing people flying in would see."
Michael Jackson wants Vegas robot
Michael Jackson is in discussions about creating a 50-foot robotic replica of himself to roam the Las Vegas desert, according to reports.
The pop legend is currently understood to be living in the city, as he considers making a comeback after 2004's turbulent child sex case.
It has now been claimed that his plans include an elaborate show in Vegas, which would feature the giant Jacko striding around the desert, firing laser beams.
If built, the metal monster would apparently be visible to aircraft as they come in to land in the casino capital.
It is the centerpiece of an elaborate Jackson-inspired show in Vegas, according to Andre Van Pier, the robot's designer.
Luckman Van Pier, his partner at the company behind the proposal, claims blueprints have been drawn up for the show and seen by the star.
"Michael's looked at the sketches and likes them," he told the New York Daily News.
On the subject of the robot, he continued: "It would be in the desert sands. Laser beams would shoot out of it so it would be the first thing people flying in would see."
Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
Some yong attention-seeker went and got himself suspended or sent home from school for dressing like a pirate at school, and he's claiming religious persecution.
I haven't read it yet, but I'm sure it's mildly amusing... and probably not much more than "mildly."
I haven't read it yet, but I'm sure it's mildly amusing... and probably not much more than "mildly."
Mexico City Program Unveils Program To Increase Thefts
I wonder if you can turn in an Xbox for a gun if you promise to take it out of Mexico City? Now that'd be a "turn-in" program I could support.
I'm sure they make the criminals promise not to steal more guns to turn in.
Mexico City is offering to give an Xbox video game console anyone who turns in a gun:
Police who have raided vice-ridden Mexico City neighborhoods in a push against drug violence hope to take guns off the streets by offering to swap them for computers and video-game consoles.
Launching the program Tuesday in the notorious inner-city barrio of Tepito, which police stormed last month, city police chief Joel Ortega said anyone who turns in a high-caliber weapon like a machine gun will get a computer.
Owners can swap smaller guns for cash or Microsoft Corp.'s Xbox video-game consoles under the plan.
I would, of course, prefer to see folks taking out virtual baddies in Halo than fellow citizens on the city streets. But, as Techdirt points out, the plan is likely to backfire:
The hope is that this will get guns off the street, reducing crime. Of course, it could just mean that folks with guns will now be stealing more guns in order to get an Xbox while keeping a gun on the side (just in case).
Cell Phones, What Are They Good For? Huh! Say It Again!!
My favorite cranky Englishman, John Derbyshire, on cell phones:
Am I the last person in the world not to own a cell phone? I noticed at the airports, on the plane, in the streets, two people out of three are talking into cell phones, or fiddling with those little things with minuscule writing on teeny screens with teeny-tiny keys that go about three to the average adult fingertip. How d'you use those things?
And what do people say into their cell phones? They tell each other where they are and what they're doing, that's what. I rode in a shuttle from La Guardia parking lot to the terminal next to a middle-aged woman with a cell phone. She dialed up. "Hey! Just thought I'd give you a call. ... I'm in the shuttle, going to the terminal. ... Right. ... OK, see you in a few days. Bye!" Then she dialed someone else and told her the same thing. I've been having visions of the rest of this woman's day. "Hi! I'm in the departure lounge..." "Hey! How's it going? I just got on the plane..." "Whassup? I got caught short—I'm in the bathroom voiding my bowels..." Is this what the human race has come to?
Guinness Bubbles
Yes, the bubbles in a pint of Guinness travel downward. Leave it the the Irish to devise such a unique phenomenon.
7-Legged Deer Found in Wisconsin, Dec 13, 2006
I feel sorry for this poor creature. And if I were this guy, there's no way this side of hell I'd have eaten the deer!
FOND DU LAC, Wis. — Rick Lisko hunts deer with a bow, but got his most unusual one driving his truck down his mile-long driveway.
The young buck had nub antlers – and seven legs. Lisko said it also had both male and female reproductive organs. ...
"It was definitely a freak of nature," Lisko said. "I guess it's a real rarity."
When he looked at the animal, he noticed three- to four-inch appendages growing from the rear legs. Later, he found a smaller appendage growing from one of the front legs.
"It's a pretty weird deer," he said, describing the extra legs as resembling "crab pinchers."
FOND DU LAC, Wis. — Rick Lisko hunts deer with a bow, but got his most unusual one driving his truck down his mile-long driveway.
The young buck had nub antlers – and seven legs. Lisko said it also had both male and female reproductive organs. ...
"It was definitely a freak of nature," Lisko said. "I guess it's a real rarity."
When he looked at the animal, he noticed three- to four-inch appendages growing from the rear legs. Later, he found a smaller appendage growing from one of the front legs.
"It's a pretty weird deer," he said, describing the extra legs as resembling "crab pinchers."
Chimps Recorded Using Pointy Sticks As Food-Gathering Weapons
Make all the Planet of the Apes / Charlton Heston jokes you want. Personally, I won't be worried until they start making crude flintlocks.
DES MOINES, Iowa (AP) - Researchers have witnessed a chimpanzee skewering a lemur-like creature for supper, but it's unclear whether the spectacle was a bit of luck or an indication that chimps have a more advanced ability to hunt than was thought.
DES MOINES, Iowa (AP) - Researchers have witnessed a chimpanzee skewering a lemur-like creature for supper, but it's unclear whether the spectacle was a bit of luck or an indication that chimps have a more advanced ability to hunt than was thought.
"It's not uncommon to have chimps use tools. But to use them in the context of hunting" is nearly unheard of, she said.
[Carnivorous Duck: This following part makes the story even more interesting...]
Pruetz said the practice is most common among adolescent females, ages 10 to 13, which must compete against physically superior males.
"It's a way of accessing protein or meat that is a creative solution to this problem," she said.
I Hate the Reaction Phrase "That's Gotta Hurt"....
But it applies very aptly here.
http://www.cnn.com/video/partners/clickability/index.html?url=/video/bestoftv/2007/03/23/cooper.elephant.attack.cnn
Jeff Corwin's arm + an uncomfortable elephant's mouth = world of hurt.
http://www.cnn.com/video/partners/clickability/index.html?url=/video/bestoftv/2007/03/23/cooper.elephant.attack.cnn
Jeff Corwin's arm + an uncomfortable elephant's mouth = world of hurt.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
My Favorite Picture of Hillary
"... as the soldier pictured with Senator Clinton (who asked that we not identify him by name) told us that he employed the gesture to indicate that he was not a fan of the senators and was not as appreciative of having the opportunity to meet (and pose with) her as it might otherwise appear."
Am I the only one who thinks the soldier's statement above is using more than a little use of classic understatement? ;-)
Watch out for that first step; It's a dooozy.
This looks like a picture from a children's story book. When I was little we had a storybook about a steam engine that dug a hole for a new building but then found that it hadn't left itself a way to get out. Of course it was given a nice, cushy new life as the heating plant for the new building because children's tales should have happy endings. That's the first thing that popped into my mind when I saw this photo.This two story building belongs to a Chinese couple who don't think they were offered fair compensation for their property and refused to sell. The developers called their bluff and started excavating around them. They're now thirty feet above the floor of the pit. While the individualist American has to admire their pluck, I also think they're fools for not taking the amount they were offered.
"Wu was offered 20 million yuan ($2.6 million) in compensation or two higher floors in the planned new building -- both of which she turned down because she wanted lower levels in the building so she could run her restaurant." Link
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Spy vs. Spy And a Trojan Horse "Computer Virus" From 1982
Awesome Cold War espionage story... even more entertaining considering that no deaths or even injuries were reported...
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=829
"KGB officials inserted an agent to abduct the [pipeline control] technology from a Canadian firm. Unbeknownst to the Soviet spies, the software they stole sported a little something extra: a few lines of computer code which had been inserted just for them.
"In spite of the massive energy that was released when the line ruptured and ignited there were no injuries or deaths reported. An example of a pipeline ruptureBut the Soviet economy itself was severely injured by the blast. When investigators in the USSR eventually discovered that the event had been triggered by sabotaged software, the KGB leadership were furious, but unable to lodge any official protest regarding the deliberate defect since that would also expose their own large-scale espionage efforts.
"Upon realizing that the CIA was serving imitation intelligence, the other recent problems with US-derived designs were no longer so mysterious. Given the dramatic results of the pipeline bug, all of the burgled Western technology was immediately cast under suspicion, a situation which mired the Soviet's borrowed progress in a pit of uncertainty and suspicion."
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=829
"KGB officials inserted an agent to abduct the [pipeline control] technology from a Canadian firm. Unbeknownst to the Soviet spies, the software they stole sported a little something extra: a few lines of computer code which had been inserted just for them.
"In spite of the massive energy that was released when the line ruptured and ignited there were no injuries or deaths reported. An example of a pipeline ruptureBut the Soviet economy itself was severely injured by the blast. When investigators in the USSR eventually discovered that the event had been triggered by sabotaged software, the KGB leadership were furious, but unable to lodge any official protest regarding the deliberate defect since that would also expose their own large-scale espionage efforts.
"Upon realizing that the CIA was serving imitation intelligence, the other recent problems with US-derived designs were no longer so mysterious. Given the dramatic results of the pipeline bug, all of the burgled Western technology was immediately cast under suspicion, a situation which mired the Soviet's borrowed progress in a pit of uncertainty and suspicion."
Those 5-Legged Frogs? Not Necessarily Caused By Pollution After All
Here's the article on the web site Damn Interesting, which is almost always pretty damned interesting.
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=575
Here's an original article in Scientific American from 1999.
http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?articleID=0004B992-1F95-1C75-9B81809EC588EF21
In neither of these do they say this parasite accounts for all the frog mutations, but it's comforting to know that at least some of them (hopefully many or most) are caused by a more natural phenomenon than our pollution.
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=575
Here's an original article in Scientific American from 1999.
http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?articleID=0004B992-1F95-1C75-9B81809EC588EF21
In neither of these do they say this parasite accounts for all the frog mutations, but it's comforting to know that at least some of them (hopefully many or most) are caused by a more natural phenomenon than our pollution.
Who Uses More Electricity... Al Gore or 25 Million Ugandans?
http://planetgore.nationalreview.com/post/?q=MmExOTNhMGI2MmM4MTQyZDBiMWM2NjJlYWE3YjE1MGE=
"Up to 95% of people in Sub-Saharan countries have no electricity, Al Gore personally uses more electricity in a week than 25 million Ugandans do in a year – and agitators are telling Africans the biggest threat they face is hypothetical climate change."
Tha's all 25 million Ugandans put together.
Do the math.
If his weekly use equaled (instead of exceeding) that of 25M Ugandans' annual usage , then his annual usage is 52 x that of 25 million Ugandans.
This mean (including his heated pool and heated poolhouse) he uses 1 Billion, 300 million times more electricity each year than each Ugandan has the privelege to access.
And he wants to keep these people devoid of electricity, because letting them gain even minimal usage would create the same exhaust gases he does.
Sheez.
"Up to 95% of people in Sub-Saharan countries have no electricity, Al Gore personally uses more electricity in a week than 25 million Ugandans do in a year – and agitators are telling Africans the biggest threat they face is hypothetical climate change."
Tha's all 25 million Ugandans put together.
Do the math.
If his weekly use equaled (instead of exceeding) that of 25M Ugandans' annual usage , then his annual usage is 52 x that of 25 million Ugandans.
This mean (including his heated pool and heated poolhouse) he uses 1 Billion, 300 million times more electricity each year than each Ugandan has the privelege to access.
And he wants to keep these people devoid of electricity, because letting them gain even minimal usage would create the same exhaust gases he does.
Sheez.
Why is Global Warming Such a Partisan Issue?
Is it because all Republicans are ignorant and hate the earth... or is it because they won't accept the premise that the emperor's new clothes are the best they've ever seen, and instead, raise the idea that the emperor doesn't seem to have any clothes on at all?
"Chait falls victim to the idea that for some people -- those rational beings in the reality-based community -- political perspectives flow from a fountain of facts."
http://sciencepolicy.colorado.edu/prometheus/archives/science_politics/001152why_is_climate_chang.html
"Chait falls victim to the idea that for some people -- those rational beings in the reality-based community -- political perspectives flow from a fountain of facts."
http://sciencepolicy.colorado.edu/prometheus/archives/science_politics/001152why_is_climate_chang.html
Why Did Global Warming Become a Moral Issue?
Because that's the best way to squash dissent... just as the old heirarchies squashed dissenting religions in their realms in the days of old.
http://www.americanthinker.com/2007/03/why_did_global_warming_become.html
http://www.americanthinker.com/2007/03/why_did_global_warming_become.html
Scientists Create Frenchman In Laboratory
they've created a creature that's 15% human and 85% sheep.
http://www.mailonsunday.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=444436&in_page_id=1770&in_a_source
Now scientists create a sheep that's 15% human
By CLAUDIA JOSEPH -
Last updated at 15:53pm on 27th March 2007
Scientists have created the world's first human-sheep chimera - which has the body of a sheep and half-human organs.
The sheep have 15 per cent human cells and 85 per cent animal cells - and their evolution brings the prospect of animal organs being transplanted into humans one step closer.
Professor Esmail Zanjani, of the University of Nevada, has spent seven years and £5million perfecting the technique, which involves injecting adult human cells into a sheep's foetus.
http://www.mailonsunday.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=444436&in_page_id=1770&in_a_source
Now scientists create a sheep that's 15% human
By CLAUDIA JOSEPH -
Last updated at 15:53pm on 27th March 2007
Scientists have created the world's first human-sheep chimera - which has the body of a sheep and half-human organs.
The sheep have 15 per cent human cells and 85 per cent animal cells - and their evolution brings the prospect of animal organs being transplanted into humans one step closer.
Professor Esmail Zanjani, of the University of Nevada, has spent seven years and £5million perfecting the technique, which involves injecting adult human cells into a sheep's foetus.
Bizarre Hexagon Found on Saturn
It's an atmospheric formation, and there are no primitive apemen dancing
around it with bones in their hands that we can tell.
http://www.usatoday.com/tech/science/space/2007-03-27-saturn-hexagon_N.htm
The caption to the first photo in the USA Today story reads:
A bizarre six-sided hexagon feature encircles the entire north pole of Saturn. The hexagon is nearly 15,000 miles (25,000 kilometers) across.NASA/JPL/University of Arizona
I would think a 5-sided or 7-sided hexagon would be more bizarrre. A 6-sided hexagon seems pretty normal to me. Kudos to USA Today's crack team of journalists for that caption.
around it with bones in their hands that we can tell.
http://www.usatoday.com/tech/science/space/2007-03-27-saturn-hexagon_N.htm
The caption to the first photo in the USA Today story reads:
A bizarre six-sided hexagon feature encircles the entire north pole of Saturn. The hexagon is nearly 15,000 miles (25,000 kilometers) across.NASA/JPL/University of Arizona
I would think a 5-sided or 7-sided hexagon would be more bizarrre. A 6-sided hexagon seems pretty normal to me. Kudos to USA Today's crack team of journalists for that caption.
Dog Gave Heimlich Manuever?
Anyone else just a wee bit skeptical of this story?
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/03/28/ap/strange/main2617914.shtml
Debbie Parkhurst, 45, of Calvert told the Cecil Whig she was eating an apple at her home Friday when a piece lodged in her throat. She attempted to perform the Heimlich maneuver on herself but it didn't work. After she began beating on her chest, she said Toby noticed and got involved."The next think I know, Toby's up on his hind feet and he's got his front paws on my shoulders," she recalled. "He pushed me to the ground, and once I was on my back, he began jumping up and down on my chest.
"That's when the apple dislodged and Toby started licking her face to keep her from passing out, she said.
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/03/28/ap/strange/main2617914.shtml
Debbie Parkhurst, 45, of Calvert told the Cecil Whig she was eating an apple at her home Friday when a piece lodged in her throat. She attempted to perform the Heimlich maneuver on herself but it didn't work. After she began beating on her chest, she said Toby noticed and got involved."The next think I know, Toby's up on his hind feet and he's got his front paws on my shoulders," she recalled. "He pushed me to the ground, and once I was on my back, he began jumping up and down on my chest.
"That's when the apple dislodged and Toby started licking her face to keep her from passing out, she said.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Hillary Promises "Universal Health Care" If She's Elected President
And of course, to anyone who has researched the issue or ever had problems with physicians, that is a commercial for her competitor... whoever it might be.
Tha plan goes something like this. You go to the doctors assigned to you by the government (the Government being the epitome of efficiency... just look at road crews sleeping on the job) and if you go to another one, you and the physician are both in serious trouble. Why? Because Government Beaurocracy (all bow down and praise its name) always knows best. And because the politicians won't be subject to the law any more than they have to minimize their energy usage while scolding us for using too much.
If that were in effect during the early 90s I'd be dead now.
If it were in effect in the 80s, my aunt Mereada would be dead now.
I think it all comces down to this. Do you think people be trusted to find their own best interests, or should the unwashed masses have to do what their "betters" dictate? And if it hurts individuals, then those peopole just have to accept that sacrifice "for the good of the group?"
Tha plan goes something like this. You go to the doctors assigned to you by the government (the Government being the epitome of efficiency... just look at road crews sleeping on the job) and if you go to another one, you and the physician are both in serious trouble. Why? Because Government Beaurocracy (all bow down and praise its name) always knows best. And because the politicians won't be subject to the law any more than they have to minimize their energy usage while scolding us for using too much.
If that were in effect during the early 90s I'd be dead now.
If it were in effect in the 80s, my aunt Mereada would be dead now.
I think it all comces down to this. Do you think people be trusted to find their own best interests, or should the unwashed masses have to do what their "betters" dictate? And if it hurts individuals, then those peopole just have to accept that sacrifice "for the good of the group?"
Monday, March 26, 2007
Al Gore's Not a Doctor, But He *Is* a Master of Metaphor
Al Gore, the new Renaissance Man for the 21st century is saying "The world has a slight fever. We'll have to remove your head."
See more Michael Ramirez political cartoons here
http://www.jewishworldreview.com/toons/ramirez/ramirez1.asp
36% of DC Adults Are Functionally Illiterate
What surprises me here is that 20% of adults in America are functionally illiterate. I never would have imagined the rate would be that high.
WASHINGTON - About one-third of the people living in the national's capital are functionally illiterate, compared with about one-fifth nationally, according to a report on the District of Columbia.
http://www.dailymail.com/story/Entertainment/+/2007032058/Study-finds-D.C-illiteracy-rate-higher-than-national-average
I don't understand why this story is in the "Entertainment" section of this newspaper.
WASHINGTON - About one-third of the people living in the national's capital are functionally illiterate, compared with about one-fifth nationally, according to a report on the District of Columbia.
http://www.dailymail.com/story/Entertainment/+/2007032058/Study-finds-D.C-illiteracy-rate-higher-than-national-average
I don't understand why this story is in the "Entertainment" section of this newspaper.
I Dance Like a Black Woman
See GW Bush and Condoleeza Rice dancing in Brazil during their March 2007 visit, I think. See how Dr. Rice dances? She stole my moves!
This means I'm going to have to challenge her to a dance-off by telling her she been served, just like in the movies.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=2jTxlQBwYtA
It's on.
Oh... it's on.
This means I'm going to have to challenge her to a dance-off by telling her she been served, just like in the movies.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=2jTxlQBwYtA
It's on.
Oh... it's on.
Panda Poop, Panda Poop, Poop Oop Ee Doop. Taking "Recycling" Another Step
Question of the Day:
What newspapers/magazines do you think should be printed on this new paper?
Liao Jun, a researcher at the Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding Base in Sichuan province, said the idea came to them after a visit to Thailand last year where they found paper made from elephant dung. They thought panda poop would produce an even finer quality paper, he said.
What newspapers/magazines do you think should be printed on this new paper?
Liao Jun, a researcher at the Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding Base in Sichuan province, said the idea came to them after a visit to Thailand last year where they found paper made from elephant dung. They thought panda poop would produce an even finer quality paper, he said.
Who Is Drinking Your Tears While You Sleep?
A species of moth drinks tears from the eyes of sleeping birds using a fearsome proboscis shaped like a harpoon, scientists have revealed. The new discovery – spied in Madagascar – is the first time moths have been seen feeding on the tears of birds.
Click the link to read more.
Click the link to read more.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Good Old Joke
Via John Derbyshire on National Review Online. As he says, it's probably an oldie, but I've never heard it before. I like it, even though it's not based in a pickle factory.
An old southern Baptist country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. Like many young men, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it.
One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table four objects: A Bible,A silver dollar,A bottle of whisky,A Playboy magazine
"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself, "and when he comes home from school this afternoon, I'll see which object he picks up. If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be! If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too. But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunkard, and, Lord, what a shame that would be! And worst of all, if he picks up that magazine he's gonna be a skirt-chasin' bum."
The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room. The boy tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table.
With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them. Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink while he admired this month's Centerfold.
"Lord have mercy," the old preacher muttered in disgust, "he's gonna be a Congressman."
Why I Don't Have to Recycle Any More
There's a family of four in NYC that is trying to have zero impact on the environment. They're eschewing toilet paper, elevators, and everything else that is killing polar bears or whatever the latest shrill over-reaction talking point is this month (he actually mentions polar bears drowning... and eating themselves as a result of our just living our lives).
That means, thanks to Al Gore's "offset" idea, that means four other people don't have to bother recycling or any of that other crap. I grab first dibs, so there are three more slots left. Run, don't walk, to the sign-up station!
This is what the Competitive Enterprise Institute says about Gore's "drowning polar bears" exageration: (Click here to see what else CEI has to say about Gore's 'over-representation' of truth in the film)
• Claims polar bears “have been drowning in significant numbers,” based on a report that found four drowned polar bears in one month of one year, following an abrupt storm.
That means, thanks to Al Gore's "offset" idea, that means four other people don't have to bother recycling or any of that other crap. I grab first dibs, so there are three more slots left. Run, don't walk, to the sign-up station!
This is what the Competitive Enterprise Institute says about Gore's "drowning polar bears" exageration: (Click here to see what else CEI has to say about Gore's 'over-representation' of truth in the film)
• Claims polar bears “have been drowning in significant numbers,” based on a report that found four drowned polar bears in one month of one year, following an abrupt storm.
Some great global warming ideas
Came upon a 'green energy' site's announcment of Richard Branson's $25 million prize for anyone devising a method of reducing carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.
There are some pretty amusing 'comments' after the article. Of course, some of these people are just having fun with their posts, but some are serious. I've picked the most amusing out and copied them here, as part of my service to you.
Most of these ideas are ingenius and would be very practical and easy to implement... so long as we have an omnipotent government given control of every tiny part of our lives.
I think that the government should place solar panels on all government buildings. All hospitals which use large volumes of hot water, schools, colleges, council offices etc etc. If they used solar panels in large quantities the price would drop and become more affordable for the avereage householder who is effectively priced out of buying them at the moment. Also street lighting could be improved by using energy saving bulbs.
Posted by: Anita Rollinson February 25, 2007 at 08:59 AM
I suggest that new building regulations be introduced making builders put solar panels on all new buildings therefore decreasing the need for fuel and using grey water from the bath shower etc to flush the toilets. Also large windows on the south side of the building and smaller windows on the north side.
Posted by: Maria Murphy February 25, 2007 at 09:07 AM
Brian's another genius. I'm sure he'd love to have a couple of these towers in his back yard.
my idea is to use a system like those used on a submarine to filter the air it would have to be at least 1 to 2 hunderd foot towers with a fan on top to draw the air down thru a filtation system and then release the filtred air back into the atmosferethanks brian
Posted by: brian February 26, 2007 at 11:24 AM
Communism is the answer! Because it has worked so well everywhere it's been tried already. I mean, Sandy Barone is definitely the type of genius I want making all the decisions for my life.l
I suggest that we eliminate cars, roads & all small buildings to eliminate greenhouse gases, & start building only massive 100-story live/work/play tower cities connected to maglev trains worldwide. There will be all things in every tower: microfactories, houses with backyard balconies, indoor playgrounds, stadium/s, atriums, high balcony rails & mesh to prevent falls, waterfalls, gardens, hydroponic gardens, automate all the work, make all things last forever as much as possible to eliminate ethe work. Teach all people of all nations to work part-time, starting at 20 hours a week. Eliminate 98% lumber, paper, all carpets, fireplaces, insurance, loans, renting, & more. Make most furniture built-in permanent (dressers, cabinets, etc). Find ways to eliminate all or most of the work. Eliminating cars & small buildings will save lives & save the earth, as will a "guaranteed income" RFID for every person on earth, which will end the wage & end world poverty. Yes I'm serious. Thank you for listening.
Posted by: Sandy Bartone March 05, 2007 at 10:16 AM
And here's Fran's solution:
Im a woman and I strongly believe that having women going to work has been a direct cause to global warming.
Let me explain. Most families need 2 cars. All the driving to get the kids to daycare, then to work, back to get the kids at daycare and then home.
We as women are the biggest consumers: clothes, shoes, purses, hair products, make up, skincare, body products, lunches, health products, and more etc. We wouldnt need all of those if we didnt work.
We wouldnt need 2 cars if we didnt work. We wouldnt need daycare.
Its not an easy solution as we all need as a society to review our way of doing everything.
Take away all the women in their working positions, fill them with men only, the volume of salaries will drop and prices to consumers should follow. Thus, families could survive on one salary only.
It wont cost a thing and it will solve the problem in the long run.
Its probably the greatest idea yet, but many women will want to stone me for saying so LOL.
Also its probably such a simple solution that nobody will pay attention to it.
Society as a whole thrives on making everything SO complicated when it could be So simple.
Posted by: Fran March 08, 2007 at 07:26 PM
Keep this in mind when you read Richard T. Bearse's idea. He thinks his is so important that he posted it twice.
From a NASA educational site:
A satellite in geosynchronous orbit circles the earth once each day... For a satellite's orbit period to be one [...] day, it must be approximately 35,786 kilometers (19,323 nautical miles or 22,241 statute miles) above the earth's surface. That is a lot higher than the Shuttle ever goes (usually about 300 kilometers). <>
I propose that a series of multifunction, manned platforms (total number to be determined by experts) be placed in geosyncronous orbit around the planet.
Each platform will have, at least two (4) or more "carbon filament" cables which are long enough to lower smaller platforms to various levels within the atmosphere. Each platform, in turn will have, at least two (2), carbon cables which can reach the surface to be used in conjunction with "Space Elevators" to transport supplies up and down the cables as needed.
After all the processing has been completed, extracted "Ozone" should be returned to the platforms, at the very least to help repair/replentish the planet's "Ozone Layer". The containers could be lowered & the gas released at the appropriate altitude.
Hybrid IS the right idea, but instead of petrolium, "hydrogen" should be used! It is EASY to produce, renewable, "NON-POLLUTING", and there ARE vericles out there running on nothing BUT hydrogen or natural gas already! Our technology has come so far as to be able to manufacture small processing plants that can be used by an average consumer to make hydrogen "at home". As well as running automobiles/trucks with hydrogen, people could heat their homes with it!
I know I am no expert, but to me, these suggestions seem to be the most viable solutions for a NUMBER of problems.
Well, even if you are no expert, you've certainly hit upon all the solutions we need.. and you never had to leave your Barco-Lounder and Cheezy Poofs, did you? Another world-class genius without all the details of spending years in school studying science!
There are some pretty amusing 'comments' after the article. Of course, some of these people are just having fun with their posts, but some are serious. I've picked the most amusing out and copied them here, as part of my service to you.
Most of these ideas are ingenius and would be very practical and easy to implement... so long as we have an omnipotent government given control of every tiny part of our lives.
I think that the government should place solar panels on all government buildings. All hospitals which use large volumes of hot water, schools, colleges, council offices etc etc. If they used solar panels in large quantities the price would drop and become more affordable for the avereage householder who is effectively priced out of buying them at the moment. Also street lighting could be improved by using energy saving bulbs.
Posted by: Anita Rollinson February 25, 2007 at 08:59 AM
I suggest that new building regulations be introduced making builders put solar panels on all new buildings therefore decreasing the need for fuel and using grey water from the bath shower etc to flush the toilets. Also large windows on the south side of the building and smaller windows on the north side.
Posted by: Maria Murphy February 25, 2007 at 09:07 AM
Brian's another genius. I'm sure he'd love to have a couple of these towers in his back yard.
my idea is to use a system like those used on a submarine to filter the air it would have to be at least 1 to 2 hunderd foot towers with a fan on top to draw the air down thru a filtation system and then release the filtred air back into the atmosferethanks brian
Posted by: brian February 26, 2007 at 11:24 AM
Communism is the answer! Because it has worked so well everywhere it's been tried already. I mean, Sandy Barone is definitely the type of genius I want making all the decisions for my life.l
I suggest that we eliminate cars, roads & all small buildings to eliminate greenhouse gases, & start building only massive 100-story live/work/play tower cities connected to maglev trains worldwide. There will be all things in every tower: microfactories, houses with backyard balconies, indoor playgrounds, stadium/s, atriums, high balcony rails & mesh to prevent falls, waterfalls, gardens, hydroponic gardens, automate all the work, make all things last forever as much as possible to eliminate ethe work. Teach all people of all nations to work part-time, starting at 20 hours a week. Eliminate 98% lumber, paper, all carpets, fireplaces, insurance, loans, renting, & more. Make most furniture built-in permanent (dressers, cabinets, etc). Find ways to eliminate all or most of the work. Eliminating cars & small buildings will save lives & save the earth, as will a "guaranteed income" RFID for every person on earth, which will end the wage & end world poverty. Yes I'm serious. Thank you for listening.
Posted by: Sandy Bartone March 05, 2007 at 10:16 AM
And here's Fran's solution:
Im a woman and I strongly believe that having women going to work has been a direct cause to global warming.
Let me explain. Most families need 2 cars. All the driving to get the kids to daycare, then to work, back to get the kids at daycare and then home.
We as women are the biggest consumers: clothes, shoes, purses, hair products, make up, skincare, body products, lunches, health products, and more etc. We wouldnt need all of those if we didnt work.
We wouldnt need 2 cars if we didnt work. We wouldnt need daycare.
Its not an easy solution as we all need as a society to review our way of doing everything.
Take away all the women in their working positions, fill them with men only, the volume of salaries will drop and prices to consumers should follow. Thus, families could survive on one salary only.
It wont cost a thing and it will solve the problem in the long run.
Its probably the greatest idea yet, but many women will want to stone me for saying so LOL.
Also its probably such a simple solution that nobody will pay attention to it.
Society as a whole thrives on making everything SO complicated when it could be So simple.
Posted by: Fran March 08, 2007 at 07:26 PM
Keep this in mind when you read Richard T. Bearse's idea. He thinks his is so important that he posted it twice.
From a NASA educational site:
A satellite in geosynchronous orbit circles the earth once each day... For a satellite's orbit period to be one [...] day, it must be approximately 35,786 kilometers (19,323 nautical miles or 22,241 statute miles) above the earth's surface. That is a lot higher than the Shuttle ever goes (usually about 300 kilometers). <
I propose that a series of multifunction, manned platforms (total number to be determined by experts) be placed in geosyncronous orbit around the planet.
Each platform will have, at least two (4) or more "carbon filament" cables which are long enough to lower smaller platforms to various levels within the atmosphere. Each platform, in turn will have, at least two (2), carbon cables which can reach the surface to be used in conjunction with "Space Elevators" to transport supplies up and down the cables as needed.
After all the processing has been completed, extracted "Ozone" should be returned to the platforms, at the very least to help repair/replentish the planet's "Ozone Layer". The containers could be lowered & the gas released at the appropriate altitude.
Hybrid IS the right idea, but instead of petrolium, "hydrogen" should be used! It is EASY to produce, renewable, "NON-POLLUTING", and there ARE vericles out there running on nothing BUT hydrogen or natural gas already! Our technology has come so far as to be able to manufacture small processing plants that can be used by an average consumer to make hydrogen "at home". As well as running automobiles/trucks with hydrogen, people could heat their homes with it!
I know I am no expert, but to me, these suggestions seem to be the most viable solutions for a NUMBER of problems.
Well, even if you are no expert, you've certainly hit upon all the solutions we need.. and you never had to leave your Barco-Lounder and Cheezy Poofs, did you? Another world-class genius without all the details of spending years in school studying science!
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